When I was younger, I hated people telling me what to do, especially when it came to fitness. Team sports? No thanks! Fitness classes? Nope. I chose to play softball because it involved the least amount of physical effort of all the sports I’d tried (in my opinion).

In high school, I would go run 3 miles before softball practice, but when the coach made us run 5 foul poles at the end of practice, I was huffing and puffing, not from being out of breath but from being pissed that someone was telling me to run.

For years, I wanted to plan my own workouts. But then I kind of stopped because it was a lot of mental effort to figure out a whole workout multiple times a week! Two years ago, I reprioritized strength training and surrendered to group fitness classes because I found myself struggling to motivate myself to do strength training. And it’s actually been pretty great! I’ve benefited from going to classes where the teacher plans the whole thing and I just have to show up.

But last week, I noticed some of that rebellion emerge (and realized I’ve been doing this since the beginning, unknowingly sabotaging myself).

I was in a Pilates class and noticed some resistance to what the instructor was telling us to do. I was changing the moves to make them easier or stopping altogether, partly because it was hard but more because I was feeling annoyed with the moves the teacher had chosen for us, and I was acting out. When I caught myself doing this, I realized that me not doing the move doesn’t affect the teacher. They don’t care whether or not I do it. The only person it’s affecting is me, and it’s not in line with my fitness goals to not do the exercises I’m going to the classes to do.

I find this to be true with a lot of things related to health. A lot of times, we know what we need to do, especially when people tell us what to do. We resist simply because we don’t want people to tell us what to do. This doesn’t help us reach our goals or live in alignment with our values because what we value is living healthfully and optimally.

Other times, what people tell us to do truly doesn’t work for us. At least once per class, I do have to modify a move because of my tailbone injury or my back (related to the tailbone thing) or my bad knees, and I know that what I’m doing is right for me because I know my body best.


So I guess it’s all about balance — being open to learning and growing and knowing that you are the expert on your body, your health, your life.


Takeaways

1. What worked for you once may not work for you now. It’s okay (and necessary) to change.
2. You likely have all the knowledge you need to change your life and health. You just have to put it into action.
3. Not doing is a choice just as much as doing is. Think about your recent choices around your health and well-being. Are you doing it for you? Are you not doing it because of someone else? What would change if you blocked out the external noise and acted fully in alignment with your goals and vision for your life?

Health coaching is the bridge between knowing something and actually doing it. What can you commit to doing this week to move you closer to your optimal health and well-being?

Imagine you’re applying for jobs and you get an offer for your dream job $20,000 a year. Would you take it? Heck no!


But wait. What if they give away free Astros tickets to employees and have a lounge stocked with unlimited drinks and snacks? And they have blowout parties throughout the year that people rave about. Would you take it now? Still, heck no!

Why? Because you can’t survive on $20,000 a year and snacks and Astros tickets.


It’s the same with our health. We have to give ourselves a living wage for health-supporting behaviors before we focus on adding in all those extra special things. Sure, those things are fun, but you can’t survive off of them.

You have to “pay” yourself enough through a healthful lifestyle — nourishing your body with movement, whole foods, quality sleep, positive relationships, and purposeful activities — to be able to feel satisfied and fulfilled in your life. When you don’t, you feel depleted, frustrated, aimless, hopeless, sick, achy, overwhelmed.

No matter what you throw at it — a spa day, a weekend away, a wellness retreat, a movie night —, it won’t cancel out the missing pieces.

When we have foundational wellness, we’re not living for the exercise and vegetables, are we? (I mean, maybe some people are, but I’m certainly not….) They’re not invigorating and exciting in the moment. But when you are well, those bonuses of a really special bath or a massage can take your life experience to a whole new level.

​The first step has to be getting your health foundations dialed in. Movement, nourishing food, quality sleep, an orderly environment, mental well-being, purposeful activities, community, and mindfulness.

Did you see the northern lights this past weekend?


I didn’t. Oh well. It can be easy to get sucked into the hype of all the things happening in the world around us. With the media these days, we’re so much more aware of EVERYTHING we should and shouldn’t be doing, hearing, seeing, buying.

It is so easy to be influenced these days. You start to feel out of control with how you’re spending your attention, time, and money. FOMO (the fear of missing out) is a real mental phenomenon that can zap our life satisfaction if we let it.​

When there is something coming up every single week (or maybe every single day) that is a “once-in-a-lifetime,” “can’t miss” event, it can all just get to be TOO. FREAKING. MUCH. (How I’m feeling lately…lol)

So how do we stop the fear and guilt of missing out on all these incredible experiences?​

Well, there will always be more to do. More to see. More to experience. That’s the beauty of life. You have an enormous buffet of choices you get to choose from. You get to CHOOSE. External circumstances don’t control your choices. You control what you bring into our lives.​

AND remember that how we spend our day-to-day life is much more impactful for our health and well-being than chasing moments of elation and excitement. Of course those add value, but if you’re not content, not fulfilled, not feeling well daily, these once-in-a-lifetime events aren’t going to fix your life.

Of course I felt disappointed for like, a minute, that I was going to be sleeping when the northern lights were visible, but once I forgot about it, did it matter? Not to me.

So what are you choosing to spend your time and attention on this week?​

For me, it’s getting organized and starting to plan our next online event (stay tuned for something good!) and getting back into my exercise routine and meal planning after a week and a half away in Colorado.​

I would love to hear what you’re choosing this week! Comment and let me know :)